Tag: <span>Therapist</span>

Uncategorized • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

How do we overcome negative suggestion?

A picture of Victor Meldrews head sticking out the ground.
How not be buried under negativity

How do we overcome negative suggestion? The term heterosuggestion means a suggestion from another person. All over the world the power of suggestion has played a huge part in everybody’s thoughts. Politics, religion and cultural customs all flourish through the power of heterosuggestion.

Suggestion can be used as a tool to discipline and control ourselves. However, it can also be used to take control and command over others who have not been taught to understand the laws of the mind. If it is used constructively then it can be wonderful and positive. BUT if it is used negatively it is one of the most destructive response patterns of the mind. The result of negative hetero suggestion can result in negative patterns of failure, misery, suffering and even sickness.

From the day we are born we are bombarded with negative suggestions without, most of the time, realising it. Our subconscious mind accepts them and so then they become of our being, part of our experience.

 Here are some examples of negative  heterosuggestion. Read each one and think about if you have ever accepted any of these?

  • You can’t.
  • Things are getting worse all the time.
  • You’ll never amount to anything.
  • You’re too old now.
  • You mustn’t.
  • There’s no point in trying too hard.
  • You’ll fail.
  • What’s the use? Nobody cares.
  • You haven’t got a chance.
  • It’s not what you now, but who you know.
  • You’re all wrong.
  • It’s no use.
  • You just can’t win.
  • You can’t trust anybody.
  • You will become ill if you do that.
  • Everybody is out for themselves.

I’m sure we are all familiar with some of these and, of course, there are many more. By accepting these negative suggestions we collaborate in making them a truth in our lives. Especially as a child you are helpless when faced with the suggestions of others, especially if these people are important to you or an authority figure. You do not know enough about the mind to counteract these suggestions.

However, as an adult, you are able to make choices. You can use positive and constructive autosuggestion which is a reconditioning therapy. This will help change impressions made on you in the past. The first step is to make you aware of the heterosuggestions that have made a negative influence on your life. Hypnotherapy is a quick way of uncovering negative subconscious programming, especially using hypno-analysis. After these negative suggestions have been ‘weeded’ out positive and constructive autosuggestion can be used to help release you from negative behaviour patterns.

You only have to read the newspaper and turn on the news everyday to hear stories that sow the seeds of fear, worry, anxiety and impending doom. If you take these in then they can cause you to lose the will for living! BUT once you understand that you don’t have to accept them then you have the power to counteract all these destructive ideas.

Look back and recall how parents, friends, relatives,teachers and even other colleagues contributed negative suggestions. Study these and you will discover that many of them were nothing more than control by instilling fear in you. Whether people realise it or not they can be trying to make you think, feel, and act as they want you to, in ways that are to their advantage even if they are destructive to you.

So, your subconscious mind does not argue with you. It will accept what your conscious mind ‘believes’. If you say “I can’t do it” then your subconscious mind will work to make it true. So accept a better thought “I can do it!”

You have the power to choose so choose health, wealth and happiness. You can choose to be friendly or you can choose to be unfriendly. If you choose to be cooperative, joyous, friendly, lovable, then the world will respond positively! Choose to believe that something good will happen and is already happening. Choose happiness and abundance.

Choose to reject negative statements from others and affirm the good statements. YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE HOW YOU REACT!

Be careful what you say. You have to account for every word.Never say ‘I will fail’ or ‘I can’t pay the mortgage’ as your subconscious cannot take a joke. It will bring everything to pass.

Use your mind to bless, heal and inspire all people everywhere with positive thoughts and actions. What you put out comes back tenfold!

Do not let others do your thinking for you. Choose your  own thoughts and make your own decisions. You are the captain of your subconscious mind and the master of your very own fate. You have the capacity to choose.Choose life! Choose love! Choose happiness! Choose abundance! Choose health!

Remember whatever your conscious mind assumes and believes to be true your subconscious mind will accept and bring to pass. For further information contact me here

Anxiety EFT fear of flying Fears Hypnosis Hypnotherapy positivity Positve thinking Self-improvement Stress Therapy • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

Free yourself from Fear!

A picture of a tree with a pale blue background with the words "The fears we don't face become our limits"

It could be argued that people’s greatest enemy is fear. Fear is often the very thing behind failure, sickness, stress and poor human relations. Millions of people are afraid of so many things including fears of the past, the future, old age, dementia, death and illness. Many fears can become a phobia such as fear of flying, spiders and water to name but a few. But fear is just a thought in your own mind which means that all you are actually afraid of are your own thoughts! It’s never too late to free yourself from fear.

If you imagine a small child can be fearful of a monster living under the bed because a playmate has told them that the monster would grab them in the night. But when a parent turns on the light and shows them that there is no monster under the bed then he is freed from that fear. The fear in the  mind of that child was every bit as real as if there was really a monster there. When he was made to realise that the thing that he feared did not exist then he was healed of a false thought in his mind. In the same way, most of your fears have no reality.

The great nineteenth-century philosopher and poet Ralph Waldo Emerson once said “Do the thing you are afraid to do, and the death of fear is certain.”

I remember when I was 19 being asked to be best man at a wedding. In fact it was a very big wedding. I was filled with unutterable fear at the thought of standing before an audience and speaking. I believe that if I had given way to this fear, as terrible as it was, I am sure you would not now be reading this blog. I would never have been able to share with others what I have learned about the workings of the subconscious mind. The way I overcame this fear was to follow Emersons advice. Quaking inside I went before the audience and spoke. It was tough at first but as the speech went on I gained a little confidence and by the end I was almost enjoying it. Admittedly it was quite a while until I spoke in front of an audience again but I used this experience as a benchmark and in my line of work now I have to engage in public speaking all the time and I actually enjoy it. I did the thing I was afraid to do and the death of fear was certain.

When you affirm positively that you are going to master your fears, and you come to a definite decision in your conscious mind, you release the power of the subconscious, which in return flows in response to the nature of your thought.

Try this technique for overcoming fear. Suppose you were afraid of swimming. You can retrain your mind with this simple technique. Try and sit still for at least two to three times a day for five or ten minutes. Now imagine that you are swimming. Mentally project yourself into the water. You feel the coolness of the water and the movement of your arms and legs. It is all a very real and vivid and joyful activity in your mind. What you are experiencing in your imagination will then be developed in your subconscious mind. When you next swim it is the joyful action that will surface as this is the law of the subconscious.

The same technique can be applied to other fears. A hypnotherapist can induce an even deeper state to instill positive suggestion and sometimes may work with regression to find a root cause for the particular fear and release the negative emotion that has been buried within the subconscious mind. Emotional Freedom Technique is also another good way of clearing those negative feelings.

Remember to give your focus to what you want to happen not what you are afraid might happen instead. For example If you are fearing failure then focus on success!

For further help and support in overcoming your fears please do not hesitate in contacting me.

 

 

Uncategorized • • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

Take Control Of Your Life!

A picture of a person picking up a large control key from a keyboard and holding it over their head and walking away from the keyboard with the words 'taking control' at the top of the pictureDo you ever feel out of control of your life? Your all powerful subconscious mind that runs in the background and over rides all conscious thought is an amazing tool if used correctly and the key to taking control of your life. Your subconscious mind controls all the vital processes of your body and knows the answers to all problems. One way of proving this to yourself is to, before sleep, turn over a specific request to your subconscious mind. The more you practice this then the more your belief system will take this request on board as a truth and begin to make it a reality. This is why it is so important to carefully watch all ideas and thoughts entertained in the conscious mind. The law of action and reaction is universal. Your thought is action, and the reaction is the automatic response of your subconscious mind to your thoughts. Watch your thoughts!

When we feel frustration it is due to unfulfilled desires so if you dwell on obstacles, delays and difficulties your subconscious mind will respond accordingly and you are blocking your own good. Affirmations can be a really effective way of re-programming the subconscious mind to steer it towards more positive goals.

You already know that you can interfere with the normal rhythm on your heart, lungs and other organs by worry, anxiety and fear so if you feed your subconscious with thoughts of harmony, health, and peace all the functions of your body will become normal again.

Keep your conscious mind busy with the expectation of the best, and your subconscious will faithfully reproduce your habitual thinking.

IMAGINE the happy ending or solution to your problems, feel the thrill of accomplishments and what you imagine and feel will be accepted by your subconscious mind. Our imagination is such a powerful tool and by training it in a positive way it can bring so many positive attributes to our lives.

Another way of re-training our subconscious mind is through the power of hypnosis. Using hypnotherapy we can remove negative blocks that are getting in the way of our goals. Hypno-analysis is a very good tool for weeding out any negative thoughts by removing undesired emotional attachments to negative memories then by re-framing the mind and adding some positive suggestion to the subconscious through hypnosis this frees your mind to move towards your positive outcome.

Things to remember:

  • Get rid of the negative thinking – No longer think and believe that you can’t. Negative thoughts lead to negative beliefs, which create more misery. So get rid of these negative thoughts as quickly as possible. If you entertain more negative thoughts you’ll be directing your subconscious mind to create more negative situations. You’ll be using your mind power to bring you more pain.
  • Visualize – Picture yourself getting what you want and succeeding. Always believe that you can and will succeed. Mind power relies on your thoughts, beliefs and how you see yourself. Make them all positive and your subconscious mind will deliver.

 

  • Never give up – Most people give up on their goals just when they’re on the verge of succeeding. You’re closer to succeeding than you realize so keep striving to achieve the success you want and keep believing in yourself.

 

Your subconscious can work for you like MAGIC!  So use it wisely. For more information of mind related matters please contact me here.

 

 

Anxiety Avoiding arguments Christmas Christmas stress coping mechanisms Depression EFT positivity Positve thinking Self-improvement Stress • • • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

A Christmas Stress Buster!

A picture of a woman with her mouth wide open like a scream wearing a santa hat surrounded by wrapped presents with the word help on the left

 

Even though tis the season to be jolly, for some people this puts on an added pressure to show an outward happiness that, for whatever reason, one does not feel inside. This can compound negative feelings and make a person feel even more isolated, especially if there has been increased stress, tragedy or bereavement in a persons life. Sometimes the stress can be simply having to welcome unwanted guests or unwanted demands on top of our normal everyday life such as extra shopping, baking, cleaning and entertaining to name just a few but this all adds to Christmas stress.

Using just a few practical tips these could help you enjoy the Christmas season more than you thought and minimize any stress. So here goes……

  1. Acknowledge and accept your feelings. If your loved ones are absent or if a loved one has recently died it’s OK to cry and let your feelings out. Don’t try and force yourself to be happy just because it is Christmas. This will just put unwanted pressure on yourself and make yourself feel worse.

 

  1. Contact that friend! If you are feeling lonely or isolated then try and reach out and speak to someone. If there isn’t anyone you know that you can speak to then try not to isolate yourself and seek out some community events. Volunteering is a good way to keep yourself occupied taking your mind of stressful thoughts and this is also a good way of meeting new people. This can generate some feel good positive thinking because you are giving something back to society. Just remember extra volunteers are always extra volunteers needed at Christmas time, especially in soup kitchens and homeless shelters.

 

 

  1. Forget Perfection! Be realistic with yourself. Christmas does not have to be the perfect day and does not have to be the same as last year and previous happy Christmases. Things do change, people move away, children may branch out with their own friends and their new families and therefore traditions can alter and change. People who previously made up your festival group festivities including children, friends and family circumstances may have changed so they may not be able to be with you over the Christmas period. You can find other ways of celebrating together. A phone call, skype or sharing videos and photos. No-one needs to be isolated with the way communication is these days.

 

  1. Forget your differences. Set aside any grievances or grudges until a more appropriate time for discussion to avoid any negativity on the day. Try to be understanding if others get disappointed or upset if things don’t quite go the way that they were planned. Remember as the year is drawing to an end instinctively we reflect on the past twelve months and there is a risk, especially with the festive alcohol that negative memories may come to the forefront of our minds.

 

 

  1. Don’t overspend. When you go shopping set a budget and stick to it. Don’t spend over your means as this just creates unwanted stress that could last throughout the year.

 

  1. Set a plan and stick to it! Try and schedule your days leading up to Christmas so that you know when you are shopping, baking , cleaning etc….. Plan your menus so that you know exactly how much food that you are buying and stick to the shopping list. Do not be tempted to over buy, you will only be throwing it away.

 

 

  1. Exercise. Try and get some exercise and fresh air. Even if it means just going for a walk to clear your head. If you already do regular exercise then don’t abandon your normal routine completely. Try and fit in as much exercise as you can to keep you tip top and this will also help you get a good quality nights sleep to help you recharge your batteries for the next day.

 

  1. Take time out. Don’t be afraid to go to a quiet room for a while and try a five minute meditation, you will find this may also help you to recharge and give clarity of mind. Emotional Freedom Technique is also very good for relieving stress and bringing down and taking control of anxious and overwhelming feelings. It’s also a good tool for letting negative feelings out, letting go of them and replacing them with positive ones. See a basic EFT instruction video here.

 

  1. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. If you are finding Christmas preparations too demanding then don’t be afraid to ask for help! Those involved in your Christmas preparation and festivities will also feel much happier that they are able to contribute to your celebrations. Trying to deliver the whole of Christmas by yourself may become too overwhelming and unmanageable.

 

  1. Help is out there! If you continue to have stressful feelings or your emotions are escalating to the point where you just cannot cope then you may seek professional help or if it is an acute emotional crisis a sympathetic ear is always available at the Samaritans.

 

 

I hope that these tips help you to get through the holiday period and relieves any possible Christmas stress and  you all have a fantastic time. Remember be positive, keep calm, and, most of all, HAVE FUN!!!!!

 

Relationships • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

Caught in a bad romance? How to stop attracting negative relationships

A man and a woman shouting at each other and raising hands and clenching fists showing a bad relationships

Caught in a bad romance?

Do you find that you keep attracting the wrong partner into your life? Do you always end up in a toxic relationship? Do you see old relationship patterns repeating themselves?

One of the most common problems therapists deal with is a repeating pattern of dysfunctional relationships. The client’s partners share consistent similarities, such as physical and/or emotional abuse, unavailability, drug/alcohol, instability, Jealousy, narcissism, infidelity etc. And each relationship eventually ends badly because of these repetitive dynamics. After a while, such destructive patterns which often seem to be obvious to other people around them start to become apparent even to the client. And the therapeutic question becomes: Why would anyone persist in pursuing relationships that are doomed to failure? What’s going on here?

There are various reasons that this could be happening. Sometimes this can be due to a fear of intimacy with the opposite sex so we sabotage the relationship by pushing a partner away.

However, more often than not, there is a neurotic defense mechanism afoot that Freud called a ‘repetition compulsion’. This is a neurotic defense mechanism and this is how it works. It is typically an attempt to rewrite history. Particularly troubled relationships with parents, more often than not being the opposite sex parent. If this pattern matches in a current relationship the client has the subconscious childish hope that if he/she can be good, perfect, smart, quiet, funny enough etc then we can win over mum and dad and they will finally love them, as they need them to, unconditionally. The subconscious mistakenly believes that the problem with the parental interaction resides with them. With that the client believes they have the power to rectify it in changing into someone more acceptable. The most common argument I get from a client in this position is “It’s me. I am in the wrong. None of my relationships work.” So that client always hold onto the hope of being able to change the parents response by becoming what he or she wants us to become to ward off abandonment depression. Only now it is not a parent but the partner that the client is trying to please. This can often lead the client into a controlling relationship. So the client tends to repeat patterns of falling in love or getting involved with a partner that can cause them many difficulties. It’s a blind spot and no one would consciously choose this but this is a subconscious process at play and is a very powerful repetition if those negative subconscious repressed emotions are not released.

Sometimes clients have also become almost addicted to the drama of these events. It can become a subconscious way  to get any attention. This can also be very destructive. They also persevere with the relationship because they think they can fix their partner and force them to change. The believe that if they can change them that will make them a more worthy partner. They become rescuers but this can often be futile. In some cases it can just be a fear of being alone or low self worth hence choosing to opt for just anyone that will give them their time.

Hypnotherapy and EFT can help make change to these negative relationship habits  by releasing those repressed emotions and breaking the pattern that keeps re-occurring in the client’s life. By releasing those repressed emotions and changing thought processes we can help change the type of relationships that they have been attracting and guide them towards a more emotionally healthy and happy life.

Life is too short to be stuck in the wrong relationship and if our relationships are not in check then negative emotions can cause us so much stress and negative symptoms. This can cause us both mental and physical illness. Take control of your life now, you know it makes sense. 🙂

 

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