Tag: <span>Therapist</span>

Depression EFT Hypnotherapy Uncategorized • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

Believe!

 

A person holding their hands in the air in triumph on a beach with the sea and a sunset in the background with the word believe at the top.

If you are not expecting it, you are not allowing it to happen

Your belief system brings into your life what you want to happen. If your beliefs are strong enough then what you believe will probably happen. If you believe everything in your life is bad then it is likely that you are going to bring bad events into your life. If you are optimistic and believe that good things are going to happen then that is what you are going to attract into your life. Simple? Yes and no. Sometimes because of negative events that have happened in our past it does sometimes take some retraining of our minds. And also remember that our minds and emotions are connected. So, if we are going to desire good things into our lives then remember each emotion indicates how much energy you are summoning. Your predominant thoughts and beliefs that you currently hold are all relative to your desire.

We learn our belief systems as very little children, and then we move through life creating experiences to match our beliefs. If you look back through your own life you may notice how often you have gone through the same experience.

If you are feeling a very strong emotion, wether positive or negative, that means that your desire is powerfully focused and you are summoning a great deal of energy towards your desire. So, when your emotions feel bad, like depression, fear or anger, that means that you are offering a lot of resistance to your true desire. When your emotions are strong and feel really good , like enthusiasm, passion, positivity, expectation or love, that means that you are not offering out any resistance to that which you desire so the energy that you have summoned through what you desire is not being challenged vibrationally by yourself and you are then currently allowing the things that you desire to come into your life.

So it seems to be an obvious rule that the perfect situation to create and allow into your life what you desire is to really, really want something that you believe is possible. When that combination of both desire and belief is present within you all those things will quickly unfold into your life.

BUT when you want something that you do not believe is possible, when you have that desire but you do not expect it, it will not easily unfold into your life. Hypnotherapy and EFT can be fantastic tools to eradicate negative thoughts and feelings and make your belief system so much more positive!

Believe and Expect and the universe will answer your call……………..

positivity Uncategorized • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

Keeping on that positive vibe……..

Keeping on that positive vibe

Everyone has bad days from time to time. Although we all tend to want to be positive there are often over riding factors. We are all human after all and there is no such thing as a perfect life. For whatever reason challenges are often sent our way but it is how we choose to react to those challenges that determines our mindset. I’m often asked what we can do to keep our energy positive so here are a few ideas.

Express gratitude – When negative events or people have an effect on your life it is always important to remember all the good things that you do have to balance this out. Try at least once a week to reflect on what you are grateful for and why. You may want to write down all the positive things about your career, your love or family and friends that support you. Remember a really good or positive event from your life and concentrate on how that makes you feel.

Meditation – Sometimes we need to let go of over whelming thoughts and clear our minds of clutter. Deep breathing exercise and relaxing music can help with this. Also repeating positive affirmations can be a great help as this can help train your mind to believe the affirmation and guide you towards your positive goal. Click here to see my blog on meditation.

Challenge your negative thoughts – Whenever negative thoughts come into our minds we can choose how we respond to them. It’s easy for our minds to tend to dwell on negative events which can end up magnifying things far bigger than they really are. Try interpreting these things differently. For example your car won’t start in the morning. Instead of thinking ‘I’m rubbish, everything goes wrong for me’ try thinking ‘It’s good that this has happened now and I haven’t been left stranded on a motorway.’ Anyone that has had cognitive behavioural therapy will know that this involves keeping a thought and feelings diary. This helps to bring negativity into a real perspective and we are able to reframe these thoughts and feeling much more positively. This is all about re-training the mind and although it might not happen overnight this is something that with practice will start coming to you more naturally.

Emotional Freedom Technique – EFT is a really good tool for confronting our negative feelings until we can bring the feeling down and then re-framing positively. This is done by tapping on acupuncture points alongside affirmation like suggestion. For more about emotional freedom technique please click here.

Anxiety coping mechanisms EFT fear of flying Hypnosis Hypnotherapy Motivation positivity Self-improvement Therapy • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 2 Comments

Fear of flying. Plane stupid?

A man flying in the clouds with an ipad attached to his chest looking panicked.

Fear of flying. Plane stupid?

Hello again everyone. Welcome to my latest blog about fear of flying. I apologise for there not being a blog for the last couple of weeks but this is due to me taking a much needed holiday. I always choose to go away somewhere nice and warm as it is coming to the end of winter here. It’s nice to soak up the sun after the many months of early darkness and dreary grey days knowing that on my return home that it is nearly spring and the days are getting longer and the sun is beginning to shine much more warming us both physically and mentally. Sometimes it’s not until you actually go away that you realise how much the rest is needed. While I was away it got me thinking about people that have a phobia of flying (aviophobia) and how awful it must be not to be able to just escape to another country when they feel like it. The interesting concept of phobias is that there is not normally a rational fear behind them. Even if the fear doesn’t actually prevent a person from travelling anywhere it can greatly impair their enjoyment of the journey. We all know that flying is actually one of the safest forms of transport but many still hold a fear which is out of their control. So, what can they do about it?  After all there is far greater risk, statistically, of being kicked to death by a donkey than dying in a plane crash.

I have had a very high success rate with fear of flying using a combination of Hypnotherapy and Emotional Freedom Technique. EFT is a great self-help tool that can be used to bring down any anxiety about flying and the beneficial aspect of this therapy is that, once learned, it can be used anywhere. On the way to the airport, at the airport or sitting on a plane. That is the wonder of emotional freedom technique. I would, however, look deeper into the root cause of the problem to help clear the phobia using hypnotherapy. In my experience the majority of the time it’s because of one issue – CONTROL. People feel out of control in a plane. The average person does not have is a great understanding of how planes work and what the noises are that they hear and where there is a lack of understanding people feel out of control with many not able to put their trust in a pilot that they don’t know and a machine that they don’t understand. If a client feels out of control in their life then this problem will just be exacerbated. This may not  necessarily mean that the client is feeling out of control presently but using hypno-analysis we can look into the past and find out the originating cause of the phobia. This may not necessarily even have anything to do with flying or planes but may just simply be a control issue or a deeper set condition.

I once had a client, many years ago, that had never flown and even if she saw a plane flying overhead she would duck in panic! Hypnosis regressed her to eight years old where she remembered watching a news report about a plane that crashed onto a motorway. This had made the news as it was such a rare occurrence but the fear of seeing that at her young age was repressed into the subconscious causing her phobia. Reliving this event as an adult helped release the negative emotion stuck in the subconscious and we used some suggestion therapy for another couple of sessions re-framing any negative thoughts related to flying. She wrote to me after, happily informing me she had taken a short flight and actually enjoyed it and had booked a much longer flight for her honeymoon.

So, what should you do and not do should you suffer from fear of flying?

  • Don’t avoid flying. It is a treatable problem. Fears and phobias have one of the highest success rates for treatment of psychological problems. We tend to make ourselves feel safer by avoiding things but we truly grow by stepping outside our comfort zone.
  • Think about the destination you are going to. Really focus on all the positive things about being there.
  • Challenge any negative thoughts. There is a big difference between discomfort and danger. Think about your triggers. If turbulence is a trigger, for example, think about it logically. ‘Ok I might spill my drink but the plane isn’t going to fall apart.”
  • Learn some relaxation techniques. Deep breathing exercises, meditation and of course emotional freedom technique will all help. Reading is also a very good distraction or listening to music.
  • Keep hydrated. Try to avoid alcohol and drugs. Before and during the flight, it’s important to keep blood sugar levels up. Stick to water and juices to keep hydrated and remember to eat little and often to maintain your energy, which can help control anxiety levels. Rest if you can, though sleep is not essential.

To learn more and for further support with any of these issues please contact me for a free initial consultation.

Happy Holidays! 😉

Therapy • • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

Therapy is a journey – Don’t give up!

A sunset over clouds with the words dont give up

One of the most frustrating things for all therapists has to be when clients give up on therapy so easily. Many clients want a quick fix and for you to be able to wave a magic wand and make them better – Just like that! Although stage hypnosis does give the impression that this is possible it really isn’t quite like that. What hypnotherapy can do though is help you get better more quickly than with just talking therapies. The reason for this is that we are working with the subconscious. When you are working with just talking therapies it can take a lot longer to get down to a subconscious process. By using hypnosis we can bypass the conscious and get straight to the root cause or emotional repression that is causing a particular symptom. This still isn’t necessarily going to happen overnight though. Some things are quick to fix. Quit smoking can usually be dealt with in one two hour session. But for many emotional and anxiety problems we are looking at several sessions. And therapy can be TOUGH! Much of the time we are dealing with negative emotions that have been suppressed in the subconscious for so long that we have to relive those emotions to release them. I am quite happy when there is a client crying in the chair not because I am a wicked person that likes to see pain but because I know that emotion is being released and that very release is going to help my client get better.

However, it is not always the case that you have to get worse before you get better. In some clients cases they start feeling better after just one session and for others its two or three sessions. No client is a text book case. Most commonly clients are up and down as they are going through therapy and when they are up that is normally a good indication of how they are going to feel once their therapy is complete. However tough your therapy feels while you are going through it don’t give up. It is so much worth it in the end. I am so glad I went through with mine as it has turned my life around and to think I could still be the same way I always was if I hadn’t have completed my therapy. I have to admit that there were times when I thought Why am I doing this? But I knew deep down that facing those demons was the best thing that I could do. And I know it is a brave thing to do. So to anyone going through therapy I do commend your bravery. Never give up.

Another reason people sometimes use to give up on therapy is the cost. It often suprises me the things that some people will prioritise in front of their own mental and emotional health.  If someone chooses not to have therapy but will spend that money on alcohol or even drugs, new clothes, a handbag or accessories It is usually a case of sticking to an old routine of trying to make themselves better by using these devices to ‘patch’  things up. That isn’t going to make the problem go away. It may make a person feel a little better for a short while and give them a boost but that will soon pass.

Another reason someone may give up on therapy is because of outside influences. Maybe there is someone that doesn’t want to see them getting better so is putting them off. This does happen on the odd occasion. Normally there is a hidden agenda there.

Even though therapy can sometimes be tough it is very positive and beneficial and is actually an exciting journey into self discovery. So if you start the journey don’t give up!!    We are all learning about ourselves all the time and that includes me! And if you want to start your journey contact me here at positivelycalm to start your hypnotherapy in Essex.

Uncategorized • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • By Brad Mace 0 Comments

Success and what it means to you

Success loading pic

A question that I often get asked is how do you measure success? This isn’t an easy question to answer because success very much depends on the individual and what their own definition of success is. Some people measure success on financial gain and how successful they are in their career. Others measure success on how successful they are in love and relationships and on lifes achievements. As a therapist it is not always easy to measure success within your own practice because if you’ve made good progress with a client and they are ready to finish therapy you let them go off into the world and hopefully you don’t hear from them again because they are better and no longer need your help. I suppose I would consider myself successful in the way that I never usually have to work with a client again unless they come back for a completely different reason. For example I had a text from a client this week who had seen me for quit smoking hypnotherapy in Essex 6 months ago. After two months of not smoking he was so pleased that he had quit the habit so easily that he decided that he would go to the next step and stop drinking. This client was not an alcoholic by any means but he did realise that his drinking had also become a bit of a bad habit because of his lifestyle. So he returned to me for another two hour session but this time focusing on his drinking habit. During this session we used both emotional freedom technique and hypnotherapy. We chose a one off extra long session simply because he lives a long way away (he had chosen to travel to me for my quit-smoking session after a recommendation) so it was the best option in this case. I didn’t feel that there were any underlying issues to be dealt with so it was a much simpler process. So when I received the text this week saying that he was 6 months off the cigarettes and 2 months off alcohol I knew that it had been successful. The other way I can measure success is if I see a client as a recommendation from someone else who has seen me for therapy with successful results. I also offer a free top up if a quit-smoker is smoking within three months of seeing me. It is very rare that anyone returns for that. That’s says to me SUCCESS!

Success for me was learning to walk again after a serious hit and run accident. I will never take walking  far granted again! Yet to someone else walking is just a natural everyday activity. A client that is suffering from a social phobia or a general anxiety disorder would feel successful by being able to walk into a room full of people without those nerves with their head held high and a big smile on their face for the first time ever.

A big mistake many people make is to compare themselves to others.  They may see a colleague in a better job earning better money with a lovely car. That same colleague could be looking at you in a solid happy relationship thinking they would give up everything that they have to be in that position. So it’s all relative to the person.  If you are working in a sales environment then success would be meeting and exceeding your targets. Many people thrive on the adrenalin rush that this brings.

My aim at positivelycalm is to help you achieve the success that is important for you. Part of this would be removing barriers that may be stopping you achieving all that you want to achieve. Emotion Freedom Technique is very good for this because sometimes our anxieties play havoc with us achieving our goals. So if we can remove our blocks then there is no stopping us getting to where we want to be and even further! Our believe system is so important in this process. A common problem all therapists find with clients is that they don’t feel good enough. If you believe that you are not good enough for something then you probably won’t be. If you believe that you are good enough then you will be. It’s all there for you in the power of your own mind. All of us are good enough. We just need to believe. Sometimes we just need some help in untapping our potential. There is nothing wrong with seeking help along the way. Whatever your goal, wether it is hypnotherapy for weight loss or hypnotherapy for quit smoking, just making that decision to go ahead is your first step to SUCCESS! So if you would like some help to achieve your dreams come and see me at positivelycalm for some therapy in Essex.

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